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Marry a Chinese Lady?
Chinese wife is not only proud for any husband; it could be great for their
family as well. They have good
qualities such as natural beauty, traditional value, hardworking nature, softness, family-oriented and caring. All these make Chinese
ladies a wonderful choice as decent wives for western men. Please read the
following love stories for more inspiration.
A Chinese Girl
I am a
Chinese girl and I often hear some positive comments on Chinese girls like:
1. "I extremely appreciate the natural beauty of Chinese girls. I am
enchanted by long black hair and bright black eyes. Maybe not all of them look
gorgeous. But you cannot say 'No' to their pure smiles."
2. "Chinese women carry on the merits of splendid Chinese culture. They are
responsible for family, loyal to husband, honest to friends and hardworking.
They always stand by you and support you, making you the best man you can
"Nowadays, Chinese women are more and more open-minded and independent.
They can be traditional or modern at the right occasion."
To be frank, I am happy to hear that.
My Chinese Wife...
By Charles Anderson
I first met my Chinese wife on the internet, via Yahoo
messenger. It was not really an auspicious start, because at the time she
not only already had a boyfriend, but kept deleting me from her
"friends" list because of misunderstandings between us. These
were the first signs of communication issues faced between people with
different native tongues. Fortunately I persisted, and convinced her that
her reasons for deleting me were mere errors of language, and not signs of
a bigger underlying problem.
progressed rapidly, and after a while I began planning my trip to China. I
had been invited to her sister's wedding in their hometown. This sounded
fascinating to me, a real Chinese traditional wedding in a small country
area. It was just the sort of experience I was looking forward to ever
since my first holiday to China only a year earlier. It was the possibility
of experiencing cultural differences and new experiences that drew me
towards China in the first place, and this was a visit that I was looking
forward to a great deal. Of course, by this stage I was convinced that
there was a deep love between us, so I was following my heart and taking a
chance to find out for sure.
Finally, the day of our first meeting in person was here. It took place at
the relatively small airport in Guiyang, the capital city of the beautiful
Guizhou province and an area infrequently visited by westerners. This is a
great shame, considering the amazing place I soon found it to be. She was
there as I exited airport customs, one of the last people off the plane
(which surely caused her to think that I would be a no-show). But there we
were, together finally, after what seemed like an eternity of
communicating daily via the web and telephone.
amazing how quickly you can tell that your love for a person is real, a
truth we both discovered over the next month of my visit. The wedding was,
putting it mildly, bigger than any I had been to before, as any wedding
dinner with around 1,000 guests was bound to be. Getting to spend
time with a family that made me feel completely welcome and right at home,
despite being unable to communicate directly with me, was one of the
happiest things I've ever experienced. A visit to the famous Huangguoshu
waterfall, as well as some other lesser known tourist locations, then back
to Shenzhen where my new love was living with her sister, rounded out the
most exciting holiday I have ever been on.
course, by the end of this short visit we had already begun talking about
marriage, including the difficulties that marriage would entail. Getting
married seemed the easy part, especially with the full support of her
family. She was even convinced that I had bribed her father into convincing
her to marry me, because she couldn't understand why he was so keen to see
us wed. Issues of marriage, the documentation required, along with
considering how we could be together permanently were all now fully on our
hearts and in our minds. The preparations were made with me back home and
her in China, with many conflicting stories around what was required and
how it should be done. We decided to marry in Guiyang on my next visit,
only a few months after my first visit, so the preparations quickly were
under way. We would worry about how to be together after we were husband
many visits and phone calls to the relevant authorities by us both, trying
to find the easiest way to bring together two people from opposite sides of
the world, and with my departure date to China rapidly approaching, it
finally seemed like it was going to happen.
my arrival in China, visits were made to the consulate office in Guangzhou
for the necessary official stamp on the necessary documents. Then it was
off to Guiyang to have her documents signed, stamped and approved by the
endless officials, before finally everything was in order and ready for us
to make our visit to the marriage office. Much to our disappointment, on
our first attempt at the office came when it was closed, seemingly much
earlier than every other office in the building. We were advised to come
back the next day, and earlier in the day to ensure we would be able to get
the process done.
next day came, we presented our documents, and after a few words from the
official to me in Chinese (of course, and for which I was advised to just
say yes to nod my head in approval), we were married. We returned to
Shenzhen, where my parents were waiting. They had visited Hong Kong and
then Shenzhen, so they could meet their new daughter-in-law in person.
Finally, though, I had o leave again. Then we knew the hard work would
begin. We had to find a way to be together permanently.
many more months apart, punctuated only by a few quick visits back to China
to be together as much as possible, we arranged all of the necessary
paperwork and finally were able to make the visit to Shanghai to submit the
immigration application in person. e were extremely fortunate to encounter
a very helpful consular official who was able to interview us
immediately, process which can often take weeks or months in itself.
For us it was done in a few hours. To our great relief and satisfaction, he
advised us that while the process itself can take 6 to 9 months, he could
see no reason why we would not be successful. He could tell we were very
much in love.
home I headed, hoping it would not take forever and fearing we would get a
negative result. Expecting wait of up to 6 to 9 months for an answer,
our lives hanged again for the better when only a month after submitting
the application, we were advised to send her passport to the consulate so
the visa could be granted. A happier time is hard to imagine, as the feared
long wait did ot eventuate. We could finally be together.
now been married over 3 years, and while here are obvious cultural, social
and lifestyle differences n each of our backgrounds, it is easy to see that
true love can overcome any of these obstacles. I believe it is these
differences and contrasts that make us a stronger partnership over all. I
love the fact that my wife is Chinese, and look forward to teaching our own
children about how he two contrasting cultures, when mixed together, can be
a wonderful thing to experience.
appeared in print on 2009 Jan. Issue of iChina Magazine
I have always followed my heart...
I met her online purely
accidentally. I was not looking a Chinese woman. First we did send e-mails, and
then we started chatting in MSN every day. I really liked (I like now too) to
chat with her, she seemed to be an intelligent woman, and what´s important, she
understood my humor and I understood hers.
One day I decided to fly to see her. She never asked me to. So, I asked her and
she said "what took you so long?" I decided that if she is like she
has been when chatting, I will propose her.
She was not.
She was more, she was... I fell in love with her almost immediately.
I woke in the morning of fifth day, opened
my eyes and saw the most beautiful eyes I had, and have ever seen before and
after. My heart almost jumped out.
I invited her to a park near the hotel. There I kneeled
and proposed her. She was amazed, but answered yes.
So, maybe can say I did rush, but I
have always followed my heart. Now my heart was right, I know that for
Thank God for the internet...
I have been
divorced for five years. I was on chatting and emailing with women on several
different web sites (e-harmony, ChineseWife, etc.), both in and out of the United States. When I Di Fei,
she was just exactly what I had been searching for (and not just for the last
five years either). Within 10 days of video chatting about 6 hours a day, I
knew I had found the one for me. I had my profile removed or made invisible
(depending on the site) and sent polite emails to the other six women I had
been corresponding with telling them that my search was over, and that I did
not wish to waste their time.
The fact that she was Chinese was not a
factor at all (in either the search or my instant connection with her). Her
mind, soul, and spirit matched mine: the fact that she is very physically
attractive is just a bonus, and the fact that she is Chinese is really sort of
irrelevant (like brown versus black eyes). It is just a fact, like her being 5'
2" versus 5' 3". After three months of daily video chatting and of my
being introduced to her family and she to mine by the same medium, I will be
arriving in Guangzhou on Jan. 10, 2008, and leaving on Feb. 4. I am already
pretty much convinced that this is the woman I will marry and spend the rest of
my life together. Thank God for the
internet - it makes the odds of finding the perfect person for YOU so much
better. Bob Grant
She Is Absolutely Stunningly
to offer my perspective on this subject. I am 54. I have been single for all
but two years of that time. I dated and married a woman when I was 49 that,
during our dating, she was perfect (or as close as a human can get). She always
had time for us to go out; we spend time with her son as well as alone. Her
home was always spotless. She or we prepared dinner together and we cleaned up
afterwards together...Life was good.
The day we got married, all
of that stopped. She never set foot in the kitchen for the next two years,
never cleaned the house, never did any laundry, never even helped her son with
his homework...She did nothing but played
computer games every minute she was home and awake. If it got done, I did it.
We both worked 40 hour a week jobs. After two years of this, I had had
enough..I left and divorced her.
Somehow, I began corresponding with a Chinese lady. She had contacted me on a
dating site. So did many other women over the time I was a member. But this
lady kept writing, everyday I received a letter from her. Everyday I sent her a
reply. I don't know how anyone can be so persistent and never give up. I'm glad
she didn't. Over time I have learned all about her and her life, her ideals,
her morals, her sense of family. She is 44 and she is absolutely stunningly
beautiful. She has a son that is 22 and in the university. She is a widow. Her
husband was killed in an auto accident after they had only been married for two
years. She has not dated anyone or had any lovers during the past 20 years. Her
only focus was raising her son and trying to make ends meet. I have met her
brother and her sister. They raised her. Their parents died when she was very young.
I have made one trip to Shenzhen to meet her and spent time with her. She is
everything she said she was. There was not one red flag that came up during my
two week visit. Her English was non-existent when we first began writing. She
had to use a translation service for each letter. It is much better now. I go
back to Shenzhen in February 2008. At this time, I will ask her to marry me and
I will begin the process to bring her to the US.
Now, why am I doing this....the best and only reason I can give...I adore her!
Be Yourself, Do It Yourself...
Hi I¡¯m Mick! Meeting the
special woman that we are all looking for is very difficult in life but when
you meet her you just know! I met my Lao Po (pronunciation of wife in
Chinese) in Shanghai 02 /2006 since then I have never looked back, she is the
most wonderful thing in my life, since then I got my working visa for china, a
driving license, I got married, bought an apartment, and now we are having a
child. This may all seem very fast to some people! Good
Luck to everyone that wants to change their life FOR LIFE.
Enjoy All The Benefits That A Mixed Marriage Can Offer...
I have been married to a Chinese
lady now for nearly 10 years. Like all marriages we have had our problems. My
knowledge of the Chinese culture was quite good so these problems were quickly
overcome. Language used to be the biggest problem but as my Chinese improved and her
understanding of English improved this also became history. Sexually Chinese
ladies are far more conservative than Western women so you will need to be
patient with them but they will come around. As far as romance is concerned
their petite gentle nature and culture lends itself to them being the perfect
The best aspect of a mixed
marriage is in the early days when one cannot argue a point because of the
language barrier. The reciprocating respect for each other is heightened by
both parties wanting to discover more about the others culture. If this is
carried out then love will not only bloom but flourish.
I feel truly sorry for those of you who struck gold diggers. When in Australia
I usually wear the money belt but when we live in China my wife holds the purse
strings and she does an excellent job. I have never gone without and the bank
account keeps going up. I am an English teacher in China and an agricultural
teacher in Australia. As a teacher our money is good by Chinese standards but
not by Western standards. I did not marry my wife to be at work all day and to
come home and work all night. We knew where we were going before we married so
we didn't have to navigate a course after the event.
I am 6 years the senior of my little angel who I will say loves chivalry and I
love to display it. Above all be faithful and caring and your life will enjoy
all the benefits that a mixed marriage can offer.
Married to China...
Surprise, you're married!
It all happened so fast and yet in some ways it takes forever.
My new wife, Ling Hua (Cat)
and I£¨Gary£©goof off at our semi-informal wedding dinner.
I think that from the day we
met in 2002 Ling Hua (known by her friends as "Cat") and I became
best friends. From that day on, we spent a lot of time playing badminton,
hiking, and backpacking together.
Somewhere along the way, she
became a girlfriend. At the same time, I was supposed to return to "the
real world" in America. I flew home, leaving a lifetime of memories in
Coming back to America, I
felt a certain amount of culture-shock as I tried to re-adjust back to an
I returned to my old job and
started making about 10 times what I did in China - but money does not equal
happiness. I really missed Cat and my life back in Asia.
I flew to China for a visit,
only a few months later. Before I did, I asked Cat if we ought to look into
what's involved in getting married. I am sure this freaked her out, but it also
made her happy. When I arrived in China, she had done her homework. She told me
it should take 30 days to complete the process with all of the Chinese
government red tape (and I do mean red).
Knowing that it is impossible
to complete the process in the short one week trip that I was on, we started to
do it for fun. The medical exam was first, and involved the standard pokes,
turning your head and coughing, and super-small Chinese-sized hospital gowns
that left me mooning half of the people waiting in the hospital.
The next day we headed to the
American embassy, to get a "certificate of marriageability". Picking
up the certificate the next morning, we headed to the Bureau of Foreign
Marriages in Beijing. Turning in the paperwork, Cat began to plead our case to
see if we could speed up the process. I put in my two cent and said a few
things in Chinese. This shocked the government official who complimented me on
my Chinese. I replied in the typical Chinese way of being humble, "Where
where?" which in Chinese culture means, "Where and who are you
talking about? It can't be me!" The official laughed and we had a good
time joking around with him. He told us to come back in the afternoon, and we
I didn't know what we were going back for in the afternoon, but
when we returned, I was a bit startled. Official certificates of marriage were
handed to both of us, and we were sworn in and announced as husband and wife
with amazing efficiency. Fifteen minutes after arriving, we both left, stunned,
as husband and wife. A process everyone said would take at least 30 days and be
Her family was shocked too, but in a very Chinese way, they
apologized for not having a ceremony planned for us. Cat's family had become
very dear and close to me in the past, and when they got the news, I was told
by Cat's father that I was as much a part of the family as if we shared the same
I returned to America, and started getting all the paperwork
together to get a visa and residency for Cat in the states. After the
application was refused by U.S. Immigration, because "I was not a resident
of America" - regardless of the fact that I was a natural born citizen, I
sent the paperwork to Cat in China, and told her to take it to the Embassy.
Well, nothing is easy, and they refused to take the paperwork from her,
insisting that I be present. Three days later, I was in China again, and suddenly
I discovered how difficult my own government could be. All the U.S. Government
websites had the wrong information, and the Embassy in Beijing said that I was
not a resident of China either (even though my passport had 4 years worth of
almost continuous Chinese visas).
Although I was distraught, I returned to my new family home in
Beijing, to find that with 4 days notice, about 20 to 30 of Cat's extended
family members had flown in from around China to come and celebrate our
marriage. I didn't expect it, but in Chinese culture, family means everything.
I was humbled and honored as we had a somewhat informal, but traditional
wedding celebration. I even had a Chinese silk tunic custom-tailored for the
I won't go into the rest of my woes, but I have been flying back
and forth to China, fighting the government for my wife's rights to live in the
states with me.
About 10 visits to my congresswoman's office, 2 letters to a
U.S. Senator, one letter to George Bush (waste of time), numerous emails to the
U.S. Consulate, and 16 months later, the U.S. Government finally issued a visa,
and my wife and I were allowed to reunite.
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